The past two months of our lives have looked completely different. I'm laughing inside at the idea of "perfection" we all have of others...perfect marriages, perfect families, perfect pregnancies, perfect hair, perfect bodies, perfect schedules, perfect perfect perfect...Can I call it? It's all BS!
We all have to do the best with what we're given, and we're all given some of the same things: brains. mouths. butts (ok that was pointless). opportunities (although not identical).
Here's what has changed for us, and WHY I'm happy with it.
In March we became completely debt-free. Nothing owed to any collectors, creditors, parents, NADA. We worked our butts off for this to happen, had some arguments, the whole 9. When we made it I was so relieved and could barely believe it. I felt free. We were really happy. We felt to RICH not owing others.
Then we worked on building up our emergency fund. Dave Ramsey suggests a 3-6 month fund, Suze Orman suggests an 8 month fund. So we decided to shoot for the 8 month, around $10-11,000 in case something happens so we have no excuse to ever be in bondage to debt again. We've learned our lesson.
Around the halfway mark to our 3 month fund being accomplished, we decided we deserved a vacation. We saved for it, and had a good chunk of money available to just go and have fun. No worries about money included. The first trip was awesome. It was when me and hubby dared to get away on a two-day adventure headed down South that life decided to test us.
Barney, our purple van, died because I didn't check the oil enough. The motor seized and we had to make a choice. Actually we didn't really have a good logical choice other than to rent a vehicle (which we could afford to do with the money we had saved for the trip) and take a few hundred dollars in exchange for Barney's body to be sold to the junkyard.
We laughed it off, wondering what else could possibly go wrong. Instead of heading home with our tails between our legs, we stayed in Kentucky and did whatever the heck we wanted. We lived and breathed. Good stuff. My husband demanded that I not discuss anything about buying a new van and just enjoy the rest of our vacation. (Um, do you guys KNOW me?? I was on craigslist.org that very night!). I tried to respect this wish the very best I could, as well as the "No fb" rule we had decided upon. Technology, how your vices grip our very lives!! It was a good fast though. Very hard to get through but worth it.
Upon returning home, we immediately searched for a new van. Going down to one vehicle would have been rather demanding. Our remaining car was not the best of the best, and with our work schedules (me currently being gone most nights for theater rehearsal while he is at work most of the day on the other side of town) we thought it best to replace Barney asap. Hence we found "Blue." We like to name our vans after Nickelodeon/PBS characters. Blue was not a CLUE but a "duh!" when we found her. Despite her issues (window on drivers side won't roll up, some of the automatic features did not work from the key remote, needs a new battery, giant windshield crack) we knew she was well within our means and I rather loved her from the start. Even better than Barney. Like way.
Minus the first $1500 from our savings. Then family needed help, yada yada. Minus an extra few hundred. Then work was very slow. Bills needed to be paid. Just dump the jar out, man. Our savings is now kaput.
We lived like broke hobos for a few weeks, surviving off of gifts of kindness from friends and family, eating creative meals that were actually still pretty nutritious, and budgeting our gas and mileage used. We leaned on each other and looked up with bright faces knowing that we were just paying our dues in this journey of life. But we knew we would be able to get back to our goals. I especially had no fear. At one point I scrounged together $3 from our change jar to let the kids buy cotton candy for fireworks. I didn't let any of us feel bad because we were "broke" or let it hamper our joy of life.
I actually like being "broke." Because I know that there were many times others were down and I lent a hand cheerfully without expecting in return, and it is already coming back to us. I know that we don't owe any lenders, so no mortgage/home insurance payments to fret over. I also know that we have working vehicles (with the oil changed!) and with my love of cooking and finding ways to be healthy I am definitely having fun living off of our pantry and showing my family how fun it can be to find ways to live with little. I can look at the man on the side of the road holding his sign and just wave, and admit I have nothing to give him because I really don't, but I still look around the van and in my bag to see if I have an extra bottle of water or granola bar or apple. Because I know that living life isn't only the best when you have your pockets full, it's when your heart is full no matter the means you have financially or economically.
I loved being able to have a prime example of how to teach my kids about gratefulness. How all those times I told them not to waste their food and be grateful for everything because there may be a time when we have little actually happened so they could see I'm not just an old phobey making things up. I embrace this time of little, and appreciate it. I have the wisdom to know that when I can embrace having little and still have hope and happiness that I will be able to handle the time when we will have plenty in great abundance. I have learned to accept wherever I am in life with gladness and joy, and mostly gratefulness.
I have experienced so much gratitude this year alone. I am always astounding myself with how much my heart whispers "I'm so grateful for this and that." There's an assurance in my innermost being that the things I've been learning in my life these past few years are preparing me for something amazing on the horizon. And I accept these teachings humbly, gracefully, and of course...with gratefulness!!
I believe character is built when you have the lowest resources but choose to abound in joy and gratitude. That's why I enjoy being broke because I am surrounded by love, and a wardrobe that was built up when I wasn't broke!!! We are fine, and if we get in too much of a pinch there's always pop bottle returns!!!
Jokingly (kind of) but happy (seriously),
Monica
We all have to do the best with what we're given, and we're all given some of the same things: brains. mouths. butts (ok that was pointless). opportunities (although not identical).
Here's what has changed for us, and WHY I'm happy with it.
In March we became completely debt-free. Nothing owed to any collectors, creditors, parents, NADA. We worked our butts off for this to happen, had some arguments, the whole 9. When we made it I was so relieved and could barely believe it. I felt free. We were really happy. We felt to RICH not owing others.
Then we worked on building up our emergency fund. Dave Ramsey suggests a 3-6 month fund, Suze Orman suggests an 8 month fund. So we decided to shoot for the 8 month, around $10-11,000 in case something happens so we have no excuse to ever be in bondage to debt again. We've learned our lesson.
Around the halfway mark to our 3 month fund being accomplished, we decided we deserved a vacation. We saved for it, and had a good chunk of money available to just go and have fun. No worries about money included. The first trip was awesome. It was when me and hubby dared to get away on a two-day adventure headed down South that life decided to test us.
Barney, our purple van, died because I didn't check the oil enough. The motor seized and we had to make a choice. Actually we didn't really have a good logical choice other than to rent a vehicle (which we could afford to do with the money we had saved for the trip) and take a few hundred dollars in exchange for Barney's body to be sold to the junkyard.
We laughed it off, wondering what else could possibly go wrong. Instead of heading home with our tails between our legs, we stayed in Kentucky and did whatever the heck we wanted. We lived and breathed. Good stuff. My husband demanded that I not discuss anything about buying a new van and just enjoy the rest of our vacation. (Um, do you guys KNOW me?? I was on craigslist.org that very night!). I tried to respect this wish the very best I could, as well as the "No fb" rule we had decided upon. Technology, how your vices grip our very lives!! It was a good fast though. Very hard to get through but worth it.
Upon returning home, we immediately searched for a new van. Going down to one vehicle would have been rather demanding. Our remaining car was not the best of the best, and with our work schedules (me currently being gone most nights for theater rehearsal while he is at work most of the day on the other side of town) we thought it best to replace Barney asap. Hence we found "Blue." We like to name our vans after Nickelodeon/PBS characters. Blue was not a CLUE but a "duh!" when we found her. Despite her issues (window on drivers side won't roll up, some of the automatic features did not work from the key remote, needs a new battery, giant windshield crack) we knew she was well within our means and I rather loved her from the start. Even better than Barney. Like way.
Minus the first $1500 from our savings. Then family needed help, yada yada. Minus an extra few hundred. Then work was very slow. Bills needed to be paid. Just dump the jar out, man. Our savings is now kaput.
We lived like broke hobos for a few weeks, surviving off of gifts of kindness from friends and family, eating creative meals that were actually still pretty nutritious, and budgeting our gas and mileage used. We leaned on each other and looked up with bright faces knowing that we were just paying our dues in this journey of life. But we knew we would be able to get back to our goals. I especially had no fear. At one point I scrounged together $3 from our change jar to let the kids buy cotton candy for fireworks. I didn't let any of us feel bad because we were "broke" or let it hamper our joy of life.
I actually like being "broke." Because I know that there were many times others were down and I lent a hand cheerfully without expecting in return, and it is already coming back to us. I know that we don't owe any lenders, so no mortgage/home insurance payments to fret over. I also know that we have working vehicles (with the oil changed!) and with my love of cooking and finding ways to be healthy I am definitely having fun living off of our pantry and showing my family how fun it can be to find ways to live with little. I can look at the man on the side of the road holding his sign and just wave, and admit I have nothing to give him because I really don't, but I still look around the van and in my bag to see if I have an extra bottle of water or granola bar or apple. Because I know that living life isn't only the best when you have your pockets full, it's when your heart is full no matter the means you have financially or economically.
I loved being able to have a prime example of how to teach my kids about gratefulness. How all those times I told them not to waste their food and be grateful for everything because there may be a time when we have little actually happened so they could see I'm not just an old phobey making things up. I embrace this time of little, and appreciate it. I have the wisdom to know that when I can embrace having little and still have hope and happiness that I will be able to handle the time when we will have plenty in great abundance. I have learned to accept wherever I am in life with gladness and joy, and mostly gratefulness.
I have experienced so much gratitude this year alone. I am always astounding myself with how much my heart whispers "I'm so grateful for this and that." There's an assurance in my innermost being that the things I've been learning in my life these past few years are preparing me for something amazing on the horizon. And I accept these teachings humbly, gracefully, and of course...with gratefulness!!
I believe character is built when you have the lowest resources but choose to abound in joy and gratitude. That's why I enjoy being broke because I am surrounded by love, and a wardrobe that was built up when I wasn't broke!!! We are fine, and if we get in too much of a pinch there's always pop bottle returns!!!
Jokingly (kind of) but happy (seriously),
Monica
This post spoke to me on so many levels! Your gratefulness and optimism is contagious, woman!
ReplyDeleteThanks SaMona! I'm glad you were able to receive something positive from it :)
ReplyDelete